Monday Moanin’: Nobody knows what the hell they’re doing

By Jeff Salisbury

Maybe you’ve seen mister journalism2the video of people of all ages, offering words of wisdom to those of their generation, but just a bit younger. I spotted it on Facebook over the weekend and learned that it’s connected to Canadian Broadcasting Corporation’s online and radio magazine WireTap saying farewell.

I’m a big fan of National Public Radio and a pretty regular listener of Michigan Public Radio via WGVU out of Grand Valley State University. However, even that being the case, I’d never heard of nor caught and programming by either the CBC nor WireTap. More’s the pity I guess.

Anyway, for more on the radio program which will still be available to U.S. audiences on PRI through June 2016, follow this link:

Here are some snippets I gathered… no transcript was available so bear with me. It is not even remotely a complete transcript – it’s just my collection. But if you want to listen – and I hope you do — I’ve pasted a link at the bottom of the following “advice”… so I make no claim I have this even remotely verbatim.

So, just have fun with this… and pause… to reflect. Some of these admonitions and advice are really worth it…. Really.

Early elementary students…
Dear 6-year-old, training wheels are for babies!

Just let go already.

Regards, a 7-year-old.
Dear 7-year-old, no matter what anyone says, STAY WEIRD!

Signed, an 8-year-old.
Dear 8-year-old, find out your babysitter’s weakness then use it against them.

If your babysitter doesn’t like feet, learn to stand on your head and stick your feet in their face.

Signed, a 9-year-old.
Dear 9-year-old, don’t get involved with the ‘popular kids.’

They’re narcissistic capitalists that know nothing about politics.

Signed, a 12-year-old.

The Teen Years…
Dear 12-year-old, ask her to dance. Just trust me on this one.

Signed, a 16-year-old.
Dear 16-year-old, don’t let your mom throw away your Legos.

Signed, an 18-year-old.
Dear 18-year-old, go easy on the makeup. You’re not as ugly as you think.

Love, a 19-year-old.

Be careful at buffets.

Just because it says ‘all you can eat’ doesn’t mean you should eat all you can.

Love, a 20-year-old.
Watch out for married men.

If he says he has a vacation home in the suburbs, he’s married.

Sincerely, a 24-year-old.
Sometimes salad isn’t the best option.

Signed, a 28-year-old.
Change is good.

Signed, a 30-year-old.
To be an artist, you have to make art.

Yours, a 32-year-old.
Family is the most important.

Love, a 34-year-old.

Forty & Fifty-somethings…
Dear 36-year-old, stop caring so much about what other people think.

They’re not thinking about you at all.

Signed, a 47-year-old.
Always tell the truth. Except when it comes to your online dating profile.

Signed, a 51-year-old.
Don’t be a crazy cat lady.

Signed, a 53-year-old.
Try something new at every age!

Adventurously yours, a 72-year-old.
Spend all your money, otherwise your kids are going to do it for you.

Sincerely, an 85-year-old.
Indulge your sweet tooth!

Love, an 88-year-old.
Staring at 100…

Cultivate younger friends.

Sincerely, 91-years-old.

But mostly, don’t listen to other people’s advice.
Signed, a 93-year-old.

Just do your own thing, that’s the way I see it.

Nobody knows what the hell they’re doing.

Here’s a link to the video.

Oh my gosh but it was terrific.
Watch it twice.
Share it three times.
Signed, 66-year old me

Movie Review:

Back to The Old Regent again over the weekend, this time with my Grandson Mitchell as we took in the $3 Saturday matinee showing of “Fantastic Four” and thoroughly enjoyed it.

Directed by Josh Trank, and also titled Fantastic Four, was released on Aug. 7, 2015, the film stars Miles Teller as Reed Richards, Kate Mara as Sue Storm, Michael B. Jordan as Johnny Storm, Jamie Bell as Ben Grimm and Toby Kebbell as Doctor Doom. Mitchell said he read that a sequel to Fantastic Four is reportedly scheduled to be released in 2017.

The promotional literature describes the movie as an adventure of “…four young outsiders teleport to an alternate and dangerous universe which alters their physical form in shocking ways. The four must learn to harness their new abilities and work together to save Earth from a former friend turned enemy.”  The Fantastic Four is a fictional superhero team appearing in American comic books published by Marvel Comics. The group debuted in comic book form as The Fantastic Four in November 1961. The Fantastic Four was the first superhero team created by writer-editor Stan Lee and artist/co-plotter Jack Kirby.

The back-story took a bit of patience as a viewer but since neither Mitch nor I had read the Marvel Comics on which the movie is based, I think we appreciated the rather methodical pace.

From his garage to his elementary school and then high school science projects and science fair budding scientist we follow Reed (and to some extent his friend and neighbor Ben) to a government research lab where he meets a group of collaborators determined to move matter across time and space and dimensions.

Mitchell and I look forward to further adventures of the Fantastic Four. A great parent-child or whole family flick. And the Old Regent is such a great venue. I am a fan of the Old Regent and now too of the Fantastic Four!

Open Mon – Sat at 7:00 pm $4.00
Matinees on Saturday at 2:00 pm $3.00

Mondays – 2-for-1 admission
Tuesdays – B.Y.O.B. for free popcorn
Wednesdays – Facebook fan special




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